MINE!!

Ok, for those of you who don’t know, I work in a large office building that is managed by Company X, and have worked here for going on 5 years. All the offices on our floor are pretty much separate companies, but we share the same kitchen on our floor. Most of the people are really nice, and I tend to at least say “hello” to anyone I pass in the halls or run into in the kitchen. This is because I am a pleasant person and not a bitch. Most everyone will say “hi” back, even if they don’t know me or I don’t know them. Common courtesy, you know?

So we have established that on our floor, every person I have crossed paths with is at the very least courteous. Which is why I am so frustrated and perplexed right now.

You see, since I have worked in this building, I have been bringing my own bottled water to work. We have no water cooler, and although Company X does provide their own bottled water, they charge $1 a bottle, which to me is ridiculous. So I buy about a case of bottled waters a week at Costco for like $4 a case, which runs about 13 cents a bottle. (Yes, I am frugal, at least with some things…) And every day, I bring in 5 or so bottles and stick them in the crisper drawer in the fridge in our community kitchen. For five years I have done this, and have had no problems. I just put a note in the drawer as well indicating that this water belonged to dasi, and it was left alone.

Well, after a five years, this sign had become pretty beat up. So I took it out of the drawer two weeks ago and tossed it, with every intention of making a new one. Then, as you know, Lexie got sick, and I was out for almost a whole week. When I returned, I strolled into said kitchen with a bag of four waters (since I knew I still had a few left in there), opened the fridge, and discovered to my horror that SOMEONE HAD TAKEN ALL OF MY WATERS. Ok, so I had been gone a week. And so the sign was gone. But does that give someone the right to just TAKE something that DOESN’T BELONG TO THEM??? I was ticked. But I figured that maybe it was an accident, maybe someone thought the water was Company X’s and therefore was for anyone. You know, since I tossed the sign and all.

So I put in my four water bottles, shut the fridge, and went back to my office. There I sat down, pulled out a sheet of blue copy paper, and with my permanent marker wrote “THIS IS NOT COMPANY X’S WATER. IT BELONGS TO A TENANT. PLEASE DO NOT TAKE!!!” Then I went back to the fridge and put it in the drawer with my four lonely water bottles (I usually have at least seven in there at any given time). The rest of the day was uneventful, and yesterday when I came in I had brought a generous supply of water – about eight bottles.

Stashed those bad boys in the fridge, went to work, and after I finished my first bottle, I went to get another. I opened the fridge, and SOMEONE HAD TAKEN THREE OF MY WATERS!! I couldn’t believe it! EVEN WITH MY SIGN THERE!! So I went and told one of the managers of Company X. She apologized, said she couldn’t imagine WHO would do such a thing, but she would replace my three waters with three from Company X. So I grudgingly accepted, but I was still ticked off at whoever was pilfering my water.

This morning, I come in and find three Company X waters on my desk. Along with the three I brought in myself, and the one left in the fridge, there were now seven bottles in that drawer. I drank one, which should’ve left six. When I went to get a second, there were only FIVE. WHAT THE FUCK???? Ok, maybe I miscounted… let it go. Finish that water, go to get another… Three left. THREE?!?! SOMEONE TOOK ANOTHER ONE.

Now, like I said, there is a HUGE SIGN WRITTEN IN PERMANENT MARKER actually COVERING the bottles in the drawer. Which means that whoever is taking them is actually LIFTING up the sign to get them. ASS!!! ASS!! ASS!! ASS!! MY WATER! NOT YOURS!!!!! I am beginning to get homicidal here. And I’m trying to plot ways to catch this jerk in the act.

As far as I’m concerned, there would only be three excuses this Water Thief could use that would pardon him or her:

1. Illiteracy (which I find hard to believe in an OFFICE BUILDING)
2. Doesn’t speak English (and if this is the case, they should DEFINITELY learn)
3. Blindness (but I’ve seen no evidence of any seeing eye dogs anywhere, so this is doubtful)

Actually, those excuses wouldn’t even pacify me. Because it is JUST PLAIN IGNORANT to take something that ISN’T YOURS. I think I learned that when I was, oh, say, TWO????? Grrrrrrr!!!

After some discussion with my co-worker, I have decided that I will now have to actually write my name on each and every bottle. But to be honest, I’m not even sure that will work. If they bypass the sign, will a name tag stop them? I guess I’ll find out. Maybe I’ll put one in there with no name and fill it with vinegar. Heh.