Click for Baby (But I Can't Give Any More Detail Than That)

So I think it must have something to do with the full moon expected tomorrow night. I mean, really – how else can you explain all the mood swings and crazy feelings it seems everyone has been having lately? And Chris getting voted off Idol? Has to be the full moon. There’s really no other explanation.

I really appreciate all the nice comments, though. Sometimes it seems strange to me that the people who support me and make me feel better are ones I’ve never even met, but that’s a whole new subject I’ve already covered. I’ve really come to depend on my cyber-pals, and thank God for you guys all the time. I’m feeling a little better… well, I was, but yesterday I got thrown another curveball.

My boy Baby decided that maybe he would pee in Lexie’s “play area” (a room known to regular families as the “dining room,” but with no dining room furniture… you get the idea). He is seven years old and neither him nor his brother Ace has EVER peed outside the litter box. Except for one time when he was about two, and had developed crystals in his urinary tract. Back then, it was an expensive, tedious process getting him healthy again, but he made it through and has been fine ever since.

So this time, I brought him into the vet right away, figuring he maybe had a bladder infection or something. $210 later, they tell me that not only does he have a bladder infection, but it appears he is diabetic as well. Apparently if you are a cat who weighs 18 lbs. 13 oz, you are a tad bit overweight and are at risk for developing diabetes. So, they did additional blood tests to find out if he is diabetic, or if there is something else going on. I just called to get the results, and the nurse said it appears the glucose levels are elevated, so it is diabetes. And she is going to have the vet call me later to discuss the next step.

Now, other than the peeing once in the play area, Baby hasn’t shown any weird signs of being sick. And according to the vet, in early stages of diabetes, he wouldn’t. But if it’s not treated, it can very well kill him. So it is good that we caught it early. More good news – apparently some cats can treat for about 6 months, then the diabetes cures itself. And the cat can continue on happy and healthy without meds for the rest of its natural life.

Then I got hit with the not-so-good news.

Having a diabetic cat is expensive. According to various websites I checked out, monthly costs for insulin and special food runs about $40-50. Not so bad, right? But then you add in the weekly visits to the vet for glucose monitoring until the diabetes is under control, which can take 1-2 months. That charge is anywhere from $100-$150 a week. So even if what the vet said is true, and Baby is “cured” in six months, I will have gone through between $1,040-$1,500 (not including the $150 I’m paying to have the carpets cleaned tomorrow) on healthcare for my cat. And guess what? I don’t have that kind of money.

I mean, I earn a decent salary, more than I expected to earn without a college degree, but I have to support myself and my daughter on that. You all know about the Loser and his so-called “child support payments.” I can’t (and don’t) depend on him for any extra money, even though it would be really nice to recoup that $35K in arrearage he owes. I pay Lexie’s health insurance myself, and have her Sylvan loan payments until she is 22. Car insurance, mortgage, utilities, oh, and? The credit cards. I definitely owe more than the average American, but I don’t really care. I would rather carry some debt and live somewhat comfortably than scrape and scrounge and deny my daughter and myself certain things to live without any debt. Heck, even if I DID do that, I’d still have debt. Because I’m not super frivolous or anything, I’m just trying to make ends meet, and sometimes I'll indulge on something some may consider "unneccessary."

Anyway, I’m not trying to overexpose my financial portfolio here, I’m just trying to point out that another large expense is going to be really tough to manage. But the bottom line is, he’s my Baby. He’s a part of my family. And despite the fact that both my parents and my brother are telling me to have him put to sleep, I can’t do that. If he were in pain, or miserable, it would be different. But he has a health condition that can be controlled, and can even be cured, and he’s not even halfway through his life yet. To me, pets aren’t supposed to be disposable. And I’d rather add to my credit card debt than give up on him.

The thing is, it will be hard. Even the insulin part – I mean, I don’t know all the details, but I guess I may have to give him daily shots. Or a pill. And if you know anything about cats, you know that a daily pill may be harder to attempt than a daily injection. Maybe this all sounds silly to some of you, I know not everyone out there is a big animal lover, but it’s really a big deal to me. I know I’ll get through it, but I really wish God would stop messing with me long enough for me to catch my breath for once.

I know I have a lot to be grateful for, and I am, but I am so tired of these little bumps in the road. I wish for once there would be a good detour in the road of life – you know, like maybe a lottery win or something. What was it I learned back in 12-Step? Oh, yeah, “One day at a time.” I used to HATE those clichés, but sometimes they’re really important to remember.

Maybe if I can clear my head and worry less about my life currently, I can write more of my past… you know, “TBOTE.” (No, I didn’t forget about it.) Although I can’t give an exact date of posting, I will try my best to have it done by the end of next week.

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got. And? This is my Baby. All almost-19 pounds of him. Look at that face and tell me you could put him to sleep. Yeah, I didn’t think so.