The Note

The other night when I got home from the Cub game, I had a pleasant surprise waiting in my mailbox. And it wasn’t even a check. It was a little note squeezed in between the cracks with stickers all over the kid-sized envelope – a note from my almost ten year old daughter Roxy. Apparently she had stopped home sometime between camp and going to her friend’s house for the night (no, not by herself – her friend’s mom had picked her up!) and left me the note. Mentally and physically exhausted from a bottom of the ninth Cub win and a long Pace bus ride home, I sat down to read her note. This is what she wrote:

“Dear Dasi (mom),

I love you so much thank you for my 10th b-day! I will rember (sic) for ever. You are the best mom ever. I might not think that when I’m a teenager but inside I always will. You will be in my life forever. Your (sic) the best mom! I will take care of you till you die! I hope you will always be in my life!!! LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH!!!

Love, Roxy”

Now, for those of you who have kids, you know that it’s things like this that make you forget that just that morning your child put a dirty glass in the dishwasher with all the clean dishes you were just about to unload, thus spilling milk all over them. And for those of you that DON’T have kids, well, you have to admit, her note was pretty damn sweet.

Being a single mom is definitely not the easiest job in the world, but it’s things like that that make everything worthwhile. Having a neurotic, overstressed Scorpio as a mom can sometimes take it’s toll on my Roxy, but to her credit, she handles it pretty well. I think that even though I may not be June Cleaver or Carol Brady (actually, my parenting skills are more along the lines of Bernie Mac or Roseanne) things seem to be working for us. And you can bet your sweet ass I am saving that note forever. Not just for the nostaligia, but to remind her of two things: One, that she admitted in writing that I am the best mom ever, and also said that even though she may not think it as a teenager, she always will inside; and Two, that she will take care of me until I die. Number two is probably most important, because I really want to be one of those moms whose kid is a rich celebrity and buys her houses and maids and cars and gives them lots of cash. And ALWAYS starts out any acceptance speech, whether for the Nobel Prize, Pulitzer Prize, Academy Award or Grammy by saying, “Mom, I owe everything to you! I love you, Mom!”

You see, the thing is, I AM pretty much the best mom in the world. And I’ll tell you why – that 10th birthday she is referring to? Well, here’s the story behind THAT. This Friday, I am taking the day off and renting a minivan to take her and her four best buddies to the DuPage County Fair for the day. And at 8:00 pm at the Fair, we have fourth row tickets to see Jesse McCartney. (And if you don’t know who he is, go ask a girl between the ages of say 8 and 14.) To be honest, I’m still not sure what exactly possessed me to think this would be a good idea. But the bottom line is, I am now officially the best mom to her and the coolest mom to her friends, and I am kind of enjoying that notoriety. Of course, my sister-in-law is also joining us (since even I am not crazy enough to think I can handle five girls at a pop idol’s concert), so I guess that would make her the best/coolest aunt. A title I think she will enjoy, especially since this whole experience may make her never want to have kids of her own.

Roxy has gotten me more upset than anyone in the world ever possibly could, but she has also made me happier than anyone ever could. She has filled my heart with pride on so many occasions I have lost count. As I watch my little peanut growing into a beautiful blonde young lady, it scares the hell out of me. And sometimes I forget that she is NOT a baby anymore… but at the same time, SHE has to remember that she will ALWAYS be my baby. Her note makes me smile, and it also reminds me that even when I feel like I am severely lacking in the mom department, the most important person in my life feels otherwise.

I never had any idea how one small person could so completely fill your life – until I had my daughter. And the best part is, I don’t even have to share. It’s me and her against the world (thanks to a loser deadbeat who last saw her when she was five months old) and I kind of like it that way. I really feel that because of our situation we are even closer than most moms and daughters. And I hope to God it continues like that. I mean, I’m not stupid enough to think that we won’t have our hills and valleys, but I only hope we handle them with grace and dignity (or at least without killing each other!). For now, I’ll continue to enjoy everything about my angel. And if anything changes – well, I’ll still have her note.