Solar System Stupidity

Ok, I’ve heard of downsizing, but this is ridiculous. HOW THE HELL DO YOU “DOWNSIZE” THE SOLAR SYSTEM?? Apparently, Pluto is no longer a planet. WTF? How does this happen? I never thought of myself as an ignorant person, but all my life I have been taught that there are NINE planets in the solar system. All of a sudden, some bozos in Prague have decided that only the eight “classic” planets will be recognized as planets in our solar system.

I never even realized that poor Pluto wasn’t “classic.” And to add insult to injury, it will now be considered a “dwarf planet.”

Just imagine being one of the big dogs for all of your existence, some brazillian years (I still love that number…!), then all of a sudden you are a “dwarf.” Just like that. Kicked out of the Classic Clique.

BUT – there is a positive to all this, because unbeknownst to moi (apparently I missed a few issues of “Astronomy Monthly”) there are additional dwarf planets. Two, in fact: Ceres and 2003 UB313. And yes, I agree, “2003 UB313” is a stupid name for a planet, even a dwarf planet, but it seems its discoverer, Michael Brown, affectionately calls it “Xena.” Which I agree is a MUCH better name for it. Although I really don’t know what the purpose of having its “formal” name be 2003 UB313 is. Seems kind of silly to me, why not just name it “Xena” to begin with? I mean, really – do any of the “classic” planets have weird formal names? (Maybe they do, after all, I don’t seem to be as up on my astronomy as I thought I was. If anyone knows, please pass on this info.)

And while we’re on the topic of names, why is it that all murderers or child molesters or kidnappers are always referred to by their full name – including their middle name? You know, Lee Harvey Oswald, John Wayne Gacy, John Mark Karr… I actually heard an interesting theory about this on the radio this morning: when you are little, if you get in trouble, your mother ALWAYS uses your full name. Not necessarily your last name, but ALWAYS the first AND middle. That’s how you knew you were in big trouble. So it makes sense that the media uses the bad guys’ full names – because they are in MAJOR trouble. And this way, they know it. Just in case the handcuffs, jail time and possibility of frying in the electric chair didn’t pound the message home initially, hearing your FULL NAME used in all the newscasts will definitely do the trick.

Oh, my. I believe I’m thinking wayyyy too much today. Better stop all this nonsense and get back to work. Where I don’t have to think much at all. Although I doubt I’ll ever get over this whole Pluto fiasco. Eight planets, indeed.