Been There, Done That... Kinda

So, lots of people (Ok, so only Cheryl and Alice - since I think they are the only ones who read anymore...) have been asking me lately about a comment I received on my blog from an author. A NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING author. Who wanted to know if I was interested in contributing to his latest book. I know, pretty cool, right?

Only, his books are kind of like the "Chicken Soup" books. And my writing tends to be a bit on the "un-sentimental" side, if you know what I mean. At least usually when I write about my daughter. And he was looking for touchy-feely mom-daughter stories. So, not one to pass up an opportunity regardless of how slim, I e-mailed him several of my posts involving my daughter. I think this one is the only one that may possibly be considered, but even that would be a stretch, what with the drug references and all. But who knows, maybe he's a good editor too and could tweak it to make it more appropriate... In any case, I haven't heard back from him yet, so it's not really looking good. But I didn't want any of you to worry about me, because you know what? It's ok. I mean, SOMEDAY I plan on getting my ass in gear and writing (and hopefully finishing) TBOTE. And in the meantime? Being published is soooooo old news. I'm not sure if any of you are aware, but I've already been published.

Twice.

Oh, yes, dear readers, you are reading a PROFESSIONAL. So what if my published works were done either a) anonymously or b) as part of a syndicated columnist's feature, thus being credited solely to her? The point is, I know I wrote them, and now THE WORLD will too. Heh heh heh. I am officially going public. See, I was originally afraid of the limelight the publicity from these literary works would shine on me, since I am a very private person by nature, but I feel I am able to handle it now that I am more *ahem* mature.

Ok, so they are somewhat dated material, however, I feel most things only improve over time. And really, all they prove is that I was creative and thoughtful and more concerned about killer dogs than children and enjoyed the drama of forbidden love triangles at work even way back when. Why am I tooting my own horn? Read for yourself and see:

Yes, "Feeling Sad in Chicago" was me. And see? Even Ann Landers thought I was "warm-hearted and bright." Never mind that I wanted a killer dog set free. I suppose I may kind of agree with Ann now that I am a parent, but the fact remains that even back as a teen I wasn't afraid to take a stand for something I believed in and write about it. I just wouldn't sign my real name. Come to think of it, I do believe I signed something more along the lines of "Pissed Off Teenager" or something, but apparently the Sun-Times felt their pseudonym was more appropriate.

So, on to published work Number Two:

Yes, you are talking to Rhonda. And just for the record, those names were not my choice. I would have made myself someone more creative and original - like "dasi." DEFINITELY not "Rhonda." But whatever. This was published in "Tales From the Front" in the Chicago Tribune, as you can see, only not under my name. However, I can assure you the entire article was mine, word for word. And "Mary?" She is still my best friend. "Bill," on the other hand, disappeared forever shortly after the article was published. Go figure. And? The whole scenario took place while I worked at RL in the old days. Now do you understand why I have such fond memories of the place? (heh) It's a lot different working for RL now that I am an old hag, though. Bummer.

So, there you have it. You are reading a "published author." And you have proof of it. So whether I hear back from that guy or not, I still feel pretty cool.